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Blessed Are the Elderly, Some Day It Will Be You by Lisa Forburger PT - Kossuth County
I was selected as a PT Trainer this past year, a job I thoroughly enjoyed. Every time I had a new training session, I learned so much, from the material I presented, from the discussions we had as a group, and the conversations I had with fellow PT’s at break. One of the sections I trained on each time was stress management and this involved support systems for us when we are experiencing stress in our life. I found this all plays an important part in my life. My Dad at the age of 85 moved into town from the farm where he had enjoyed all of his life. He loved the land, the farm, the horses, and everything farming had to offer, but he knew it was time to go, because he needed help with his failing health. Mom was called away when she was only 49, and left him widowed at the age of 62. He moved to an apartment in town, 2 blocks from my house. Not only was the move was upsetting for him, but he had a slight stroke shortly after that and it was a big set back in his life and losing his drivers license was soon to follow. It was tough for me to enforce that decision but he handled it. He just had to become more and more dependent on others. As he became less active, not being able to get out and drive around, he became weaker. He always looked forward to 5:00, suppertime, when I would bring or fix him his supper and every night at 9:00 I would return to make sure he was in bed and resting comfortably. I would sit in the rocking chair in the dark while he laid in bed and we would talk about anything and everything. Sometimes I would doze while he dozed, it was just comforting for both of us. We made many trips to all kinds of doctors and Family Leave was very important to me. I was able to go with him and help him understand the tests he took and the results. Even though I have many brothers and sisters, it was important that we went together because then we understood what was going on. It was very discouraging for him to watch his health fail, and for the longest time he could not understand why he was not getting better. Then one day he realized he was like that old tractor, that could not be fixed anymore, that was just plain worn out. There were no more parts available to make him run. I looked and found support systems for myself so that I could deal with the cross I was carrying. I found many fellow employees that were in the same boat as I, or similar, that cared. I golfed every Wednesday with a wonderful lady, with a medical back ground, that could give me facts, and help me understand the changes that he was experiencing. I knew where to find my friends for support when I needed to unload frustration. Then I could go back to Dad and listen to his complaints and make him feel comfortable. I have a wonderful husband, that was also doing the same for his Dad, and 2 children that also took part in taking care of Grandpa. They were very understanding and knew when Grandpa needed them and when to leave Grandpa alone!! I am very proud of them. Lifeline was a wonderful service that we had. Not only were they there in an emergency, but also you could always push the button just to talk and we did. They were always friendly, even if you did not need help. I think of that when I go to the counter to help the elderly absent landowner. A smiling face, gentle voice and a quick explanation of the letter they received is all they need. Time is of no importance to the elderly. That is one thing they have lots of. I learned so much from my Dad during the last years of his life and I miss him dearly, but feel at peace because I know that he was ready to leave this world for eternity. His faith was strong and he had no fears of dying. He lived a good life of almost 87 years. I know that I have done all that I could do to make the last years comfortable for him.
My sister found the poem from an old book at the farm and she
read it at Dad’s funeral and I would like to share it with you: Beatitudes
for the Friends of the Aged Blessed are they who understand my faltering step and palsied hand. Blessed are they who know that my ears today must strain to catch the things they say. Blessed are they who seem to know that my eyes are dim and my wits are slow. Blessed are they who look away when coffee is spilled at the table today. Blessed are they with a cheery smile, who stop to chat for a little while. Blessed are they who never say, “You’ve told that story twice today. Blessed are they who know the ways to bring back memories of yesterday. Blessed are they who make it known that I’m loved, respected and not alone. Blessed are they who know I’m at a loss to find the strength to carry the cross. Blessed are they who ease the days on my journey home in loving ways.
If I can ever be part of your support system, do not hesitate to call on me. Lisa Forburger IASCOE HOME NASCOE HOME PAGE IOWA FSA HOME PAGE NATIONAL FSA HOME PAGE USDA HOME PAGE LINKS PAGE OPM HOME PAGE
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